T wass a tragedy but, when she spied Alfie's nut
Drooping down on top of his gut
She could not believe it, Audrey's sides nearly split
twas this the end of that fat wheezing git? I know

AUDREY'S ALONE AT LAST
But there ain't any doubt, Alfie left her up the spout
AUDREY'S JAW DROPPED WHEN MARTIN SAID
Wooooooooooooooooooooooo
AUDREY AUDREY...Yer get nowt

Audrey was laughting when, Nicky, Gail, Martin then
They never got Alf to take oxygen again

Oxygen, that's when...

AUDREY'S ALONE AT LAST
AUDREY AUDREY

There ain't no change CHANGE CHAANGE
of insurance, NOINHERITANCE
left in debt, she won't forget, the greedy get ALFIE

[Guitar time]

[Chorus x2]
+ counterpoint AUDREY AUDREY, AUDREY OI!

yer get nowt..