it's hard to be emperor
and when it's hard, it's hard
i'm scarred by being emperor
no ball, no friends, no yard
my predecessor hanged himself
and i might do that too
the entertainment's awful here
and, oh! the plays they do!

it's dull to be the emperor
it's deadly dull, in fact
of all the actors in the court
not one of them can act!
an early death seems probable
perhaps it's just as well
with drama in this dreadful state
my life's a living hell!
my life's a living hell