Frustrated kid, he hated life
Tried to end it with a butter knife
Didn't work, blade too dull
So he hammered nails into his skull

Loser at life, fumbled suicide attempts
Loser at death, what kind of death will he cheat next?
Loser at life, easy come, no easy go
Loser at death!

Still no luck, head too thick
So he swallowed draino, but he just got sick
Stepped into a speeding car
Several bruises and a broken arm

Loser at life, fumbled suicide attempts
Loser at death, what kind of death will he cheat next?
Loser at life, easy come, no easy go
Loser at death!

So he lit himself into flames
What do you know? It went and rained
Threw himself off of the bridge
But it was the road he missed

So he pointed a gun to his head
Big surprise, still not dead
Died one night in irony
When his cat crawled on his face and fell asleep

Loser at life, fumbled suicide attempts
Loser at death, what kind of death will he cheat next?
Loser at life, easy come, no easy go
Loser at death!