I'm always a baby
On my birthday
I think it's the most sensible day of the year
To be a big pain
And people like to whine and cry and tell me all about
Their fuckin' miserable days
But not always
'Cause I'm the only baby on my birthday

You don't know how it feels to be
Part of a ten-piece hillbilly family
I'm not the leader of the pack or the itty-bitty runt
I need to find a way for attention
You don't know all of the terrors I've seen
Living in a dirty house with nine big babies
There's puke on the couch, fridge caught a dead mouse
I need a full day for me to lash out

I'm always a baby
On my birthday
Now shut your purdy mouth 'cause it's not up to you
And I'm gonna get my way
And for those of you who don't respect my wishes
Or don't care to show enough self-restraint
You're not welcome to my party
Or even to my birthday cake

Now you don't know how it feels to be
Part of a ten-piece hillbilly family
I'm not the leader of the pack or the itty-bitty runt
I need to find a way for attention
You don't know all of the terrors I've seen
Living in a dirty house with nine big babies
There's puke on the couch, fridge caught a dead mouse
I need a full day for me to lash out

I'm always a baby
On my birthday
I think it's the most sensible day of the year
To be a big pain
And people like to whine and cry and tell me all about
Their fuckin' miserable days
Well, you're not welcome to my party
Or even to my birthday cake

Birthday cake
Birthday, birthday cake
Birthday cake
Birthday cake
Birthday cake
Birthday cake
Birthday cake, ah-ha-ha
Birthday cake
Birthday cake