Maynard:
Fucked Dolly Parton
Fucked Loretta Lynn
Fucked Barbara Mandrell
And fucked all of her kin

I've fucked Minny Pearl
I fucked Elvis Presley's little girl
I fucked the Judds

Paz: You fucked the Judds?
Maynard: Hell yeah!

(Chorus)
My cuntry boner, it won't go down

Maynard & Paz:
It won't go down, it won't go down
My cuntry boner won't go down
My boner, my boner, my boner won't go down
It won't go down, it won't go down
My cuntry boner, it won't go down
(Chorus)

Paz:
I fucked Willie Nelson
I fucked him deep inside
I fucked Elvis Presley in the bathroom where he died
I fucked Dwight Yoakum

Maynard: Johnny Cash grabbed his ankles and he hollered as she poked him (?)
Paz: I fucked the Judds!
Maynard: You fucked the Judds?

(Chorus)

Group... sex (x3)
Our cuntry boners, they won't go down

Fucked Alabama
Fucked the Oak Ridge Boys
Fucked Randy Travis with a 12-inch plastic toy
I fucked the cast of Hee-Haw
I fucked Glen Campbell, fucked him on a see-saw

Kenny Rogers thought it crass
When I fucked his big white ass
I can't help it....

(Chorus)