Jan, Jan the weatherman
Lives across the hall in an old beer can
Comes over now and then with a stick and a pan
He wants to join the band

Jan, Jan
He's the weatherman
Looks like a product of the Manson gang
I asked him about his past one day
Nearly lost my life that way

Will it rain?
Will it shine?

Once a month, a big fat man walks out of Jan's door
Comes back 20 minutes later with a hundred sandwiches or more
I said, "Hey Jan, what's this all about?"
Jan just says, "Shhhhh, I don't wanna get kicked out"

Jan, Jan
He's the weatherman
He's got a kid sister who could use a tan
She talks so low and scary it's hard to understand
What's the weather gonna be like tomorrow, Jan?