Sir can I get you some more coffee
Ma'am would you like some more tea
Let's smile through this understanding
That you temporarily own me
And I really care if your coffee is cold
And I don't really care if your salad looks old, yeah

You strike up boring conversation
About your wife and kids at home
And you keep making up excuses
For why you're eating out alone
But I don't really care if your dog has fleas
Just remember if you need something to say please

You snap your fingers as I walk by
You say you really need your check
And you don't care if I am busy
Cause you've got a plane to catch
But I don't really care if you're running late
Cause you're not going anywhere 'til you clean off that plate

So you don't really care
And I don't really care
(and I really didn't but you tipped me anyway thanks)
And we don't really care

Waitress' lament