Have you met Old Slick?
He's slicker than spit
He's slicker than alligator shit
Ask the girls in town
And, man, they say he's it

That's Old Slick
He's lightning-quick
He's slier than old St. Nick
He's singe your eyebrows off
With one snap flick of his Bic

That's Old Slick
He's finer than frog hair
He'll give you that albacore stare
His voice lies on ya heavy
Like New Orleans air

Our man Slick
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles

Slick, he's got him a new ride
He's shiftin' with astroglide
Upholstered buffalo hide

He'll steal your heart away
He'll turn a homophobe gay
He'll communicate thoughts
No one ever had the balls to say

He's awful Slick
And he loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles

He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles

He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles
He loves the Thai noodles

I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles
I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles

I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles
I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles

I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles
I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles

I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles
I do believe he said
He loves the Thai noodles

Have you met Old Slick?
He's slicker than spit
He's slicker than alligator spit
Ask the girls in town
And, man, they say he's it

Have you met Old Slick?
Have you met Old Slick?
Have you met Old Slick?