Come on, fellas, gettin' married's for the birds.
Who needs it?

We do!

Yeah?

Buddie, beware,
Buddie, better take care,
Though at heart I'm a pearl
I'm a difficult girl,
So, buddie, beware.

During Christmas holidays
I develop taking ways
And I'm not at all anti
Pretty things Santy
Brings from Cartier's.

Your devotion I prize
But you must realize, my boys,
Other girl's luxuries
Are my necessities,
So, buddie, beware.

I feel I should put you right.
As I lie in bed at night
While the twinkling stars gleam on,
With my cold cream on
I'm a lovely sight.
And another thing too,
When I'm married to you, my sweet,
If to come home you fail,
I'll open all your mail,
So, buddie, beware.